I Was There So I Can Confirm His Existence

I got the distinct feeling that he felt a kinship with Nessie (The Lock Ness Dragon) because he kept saying “Nessie this…” and “Nessie that…”

Stranger than Sighting a Regular Type Celebrity

For those of you in the know, you’ve probably heard already that BigFootZombie was spotted in the Bronx. I was one of the people (in addition to Amanda) to actually see the hairy creature and be invited to dinner that strange morning. BigFoot Zombie, I thought this was an opportunity I couldn’t pass up even though I wasn’t dressed properly for a dinner invitation.

Why Me?

I know what you’re saying, why did BigFoot Zombie invite you to dinner just after the sun had risen, and my response to that is that I’m not quite sure. It’s not because I wanted to get written up in Celebify.com.

A Different Timetable

But he did have an extraordinary wine list for being Sasquatch Undead. Who would think that BigFoot’s and Zombies’ relative would be so versed in the fruits of the vines? He offered Ritchie Vineyard Chardonnay. I was impressed. Of course it was a bit early for that sort of thing but I guess he has his one timetable for wine o’clock.

Didn’t Have My Brand

But here’s the really interesting thing. Afterwards he offered all cigars, I didn’t smoke one because he didn’t have my brand which is Gurkha Black Dragons. Now that’s a cigar. At any rate, that wasn’t the thing I am talking about. I’m talking about when he began telling us after dinner stories.

The Quandary of Fame UnFameĀ 

He didn’t hold back and sobbed on occasion. I guess being a mythological creature in the age of so called “fake news” makes it even harder on those who are considered fake. He discussed how his pal the Loch Ness Monster who has a smart phone just like him (he doesn’t have an iPhone because even for a famous creature like him, they’re a bit too pricey) would talk endlessly about the difficulty involved with being known yet unknown. I mentioned to him that I read about him in BigFoot Zombie which seemed to calm him down a bit.

Only a Special Effect?

He said that the reason that no one is able to get a good picture of himself or Lochy (his pet name for the “dragon”) is because they feel obligated to stay out of the public’s eye because it makes their legendary status more tantalizing. He explained that if he came forward on a television network or Celebify for example, people would think he was the product of special effects like they use in movies.

At this point BFZ leaned in toward me and said:

“I don’t want to be thought of as someone who is a mere FX.”